Don’t Forget To Breathe

Disclaimer: This post has nothing to do with sports or entertainment media and everything to do with me, my life, judgement, and acceptance. Let me begin by thanking those who work in the media objectively covering topics of interest. In no way shape or form do I intend to offend your position.

I’ve touched on being in the public eyeball before and I imagine most of you can formulate a decent idea about just how weird it is to have others watching your every move (or it being of any sort of public interest that you went to the grocery store right after a work out to get vodka and bubblegum), but I don’t know if you get it. Despite writing this blog, or my ramblings on Twitter, you should know that I highly value privacy. Oh, hey God, I think you gave me the wrong life.

It goes like this- I can write my story or others can do it for me.  It is one thing if I say or do something that doesn’t sit well with you. It is quite another if you hear something in the media or read something in a blog or trust some random person’s reporting skills and form an opinion. Information is almost always presented to gain attention these days. It’s as if everyone is practically begging for you to see things through their eyes and you don’t hesitate to get behind the binoculars. Wait. Am I doing that?! Maybe… Just know that even though I could make a list of stories and rumors that have been generated by this internet machine and a side of loose lips that stretches from here to Tahiti- I probably wont. The past is behind us for a reason and when the truth can’t set you free because it’s buried so far under a pile of attention needy outsiders, a blog might.

Imagine re-living high school over and over and over and over again. If your high school experience was anything like mine, it’s something like walking into the lunch room to find that there are a bunch of cliques sitting at their respecting tables and you don’t fit in with any of them. While you’re “cool” with all of them, you should just probably avoid eating lunch entirely because no one really wants you to eat with them. Even if they do invite you to join them, they’re just going to talk about what you ate, how you ate it and whether they like you and the buttons on your shirt afterward. Although some people may not mind this because they so desperately want to fit in and be accepted by someone or some group, I am not that fortunate. It seems that I have lived my entire life being uncomfortably myself… but at the end of the day, I don’t really want to sit at anyone else’s table.

Again, this is not my sob story. People spreading lies or saying foul things about you isn’t all-consuming and I don’t want your sympathy. What I do want is to share my experience in learning that you absolutely can not let other people’s opinions define you. That too is a lie because we’re all guilty here, but what I would hope for you to gather from this account of me marrying a baseball player and having details of my life out in the open for anyone to analyze is that it taught me rather quickly that sticks and stones may break my bones but words are bloody ridiculous.

I am fortunate enough to have a husband who taught me to love myself in the weirdest way possible, but I won’t get into that. This isn’t something that happened over night, not everyone will be so lucky or find the light in the same way that I did. It’s something I work on every single day and to some degree, we all have our own critics and so on and so forth. I am not a motivational speaker and I am much less than an inspiration but that won’t stop me from telling you to love yourself for every hair you ought to wax, every thing you think you’re not very good at, every pound you’re told to lose, every goal you haven’t quite reached and every person who has something less than nice to say about you. There’s a whole lot of awesome in all of you and if others don’t see it, they’re missing out. Let me end by reminding you of a little gem called the “golden rule”: treat others the way you wish to be treated.

Smile like you mean it.


p.s. On our 1 year anniversary, Mat and I got the same tattoo. It reads, “The only thing that matters at the end of the day is you and I”. It’s sort of our mantra in this crazy life. Shake it like a salt-shaker.


Sometimes I wonder if people forget that athletes and their families are real people with real feelings and should be treated with the same respect you’d treat your own family. Especially if you’re a fan of the team they play on.

Thanks for writing this! All the best to you and Mat this season and welcome to Cincinnati!!

Way to go, Dallas!

Honestly, this is probably one of the most inspirational things that I have ever read. All that matters in life is being genuinely happy. At the end of the day, nothing that anyone says or thinks even matters, its about finding your own personal happiness. I came to this blog because I’m a Reds fan and because I think your husband is a great addition to this ball club. But honestly, I hope you enjoy your time in Cincinnati too.

Thank you Dallas for putting into words what I have always felt. In today’s society, and fast paced lifestyles, the “Golden Rule” has been lost, or more likely, covered in BS! By the way, love the tat! Glad to have you, and Mat, in the Cincy family.

We are so happy to have you and Mat joining us here at Big Red Nation! Welcome!

What a wonderful message. Thank you so much for sharing it with us! Best of luck to you and your husband, hope you both enjoy your time with the Reds.

very well spoken- I love you more with each post- oh can I say that on here

Appreciate your thoughts, but I disagree wit h you… You may just be a motivational speaker! 🙂

This is kinda away issue even so require some diiretcon from a well established blog. Your site offered all of us valuable details to be effective on. You have done any excellent career! I had been studying a number of your site content on this website and i also consider this site is absolutely informative.

Welcome to you and Mat. Hopefully you will love living in Cincinnati, we love our Reds, win or lose, and the city has much to offer.

So awesome girl…keep it up.

Love it dal

Wowwww…..Thanks D….That was really inspiring..I just might not be so hard on me tomorrow… 😉

Thank you so very much for tuning in. I never really know what my point is or where I’m going when I write a blog but I’ll assume you all got where I was coming from. One love. ❤

Welcome to the Midwest. I like u already

I love that quote on your tattoos. Just live your life to the fullest and enjoy.

Hey Dallas, how about creating a user name on and come join us on the message board? would be kinda cool to have your thoughts on things as the season progresses. I promise we will be on our best behavior 😉

I know how you feel. I’m a distant relative of Corey Snyder (mlb player in the 80’s) and I travel 40 minutes away from the city to buy my vodka so no one will recognize me.

You provide great insight to the struggles of being famous.

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