This Is Another Public Service Announcement…

For some of us, trips to the ballpark are a mini-vacation. A few hours to get our minds off of things. To relax. To cheer. To eat a hot dog and drink a beer or 9. To go bananas. To laugh. To cry. You know… a chance to really just do what we want… we might order that cotton candy, grab that lemonade and hand all of our brain waves over to the guys on the field. It’s whatever. For others, entering the ballpark may be a little more thoughtful process. Perhaps you’re a season ticket holder. Perhaps you’re a crazed fan possessed by the 9 inch ball on a budget. Perhaps you’re married to the game. Perhaps you’re me and the ballpark is just your second home.

Whatever your issue may be, you might just get hungry at the ballpark some day. I know it’s crazy but hey- it can happen to any of us.

I have this terrible ailment that causes me to assume that any time I have company in town (or Mat is pitching or I’m traveling or the sky is blue) that I’m on some sort of self-proclaimed vacation. On these vacations, I tend to eat more carbs, drink more adult beverages and miss work outs. Not a good combo, said my pants… Abs are made in the kitchen and when you don’t even have one for about 2 weeks of every month, lord have mercy. Everything seems like a bad decision.

While I’d like to imagine this vacation mindset developed because I have nothing important to do, that’s an entirely irrational thought. Despite my self-deprecating tweets and shameless affinity for vodka drinks, consider me the glue of the collective Latos circus; a glue that has to remain flexible and relatively unemotional. Super glue can’t even do that.

Maybe vacation brain exists because baseball has turned me into an even bigger vampire of the night than I was before. Maybe it’s because I’m constantly stressed. Maybe I’m just making excuses and you know what- everybody does it but my goal of this season is to be more accountable to myself.

Blah, blah, blah… The point of this post is this- If you get hungry at the ballpark and happen to be feeling health conscious on that day, you may be faced with a really serious dilemma. If you’re unlike me and you wear a badge of good decisions 24/7, congratulations! Stop being an overachiever and live a little. After all, you can always spend 4 hours on a treadmill to work off a cheeseburger and fries, AM I RIGHT?!

While I don’t intend to list the ingredients of hot dogs as I’m not even sure the Reds media department will let me use such dirty words on my blog, I am going to make it my mission to point you in the direction of good choices at various ballparks in the event that you ever feel the need to make them. I am not a nutritionist, I didn’t buy a certificate to frame from an online school, I don’t particularly advocate any single way of eating because everyone’s body is different but I do have years of informal “education” on health matters and will simply be suggesting what I would do if I got to the ballpark and didn’t feel like a foot long coney with all of the toppings was a reasonable afternoon snack. (Note: I never feel like this but to each their own).

Unrelated: It’s a well-known fact that I love going to the Holy Grail across from the ballpark before games and people often ask me my favorite thing to eat there. The Reagan salad is great but I rarely order it because of the cheese and salad dressing. Instead, I order a plain chicken breast, turkey burger or black bean burger (without a bun) with a side of veggies. To wash it down, Tito’s vodka (gluten-free), water and a lemon or a splash of cran. You can skip the vodka, I’m just going for full disclosure here. For the record, you can pretty much order this mundane but functional cuisine at any restaurant so never hesitate to let your freak flag fly and make special requests.

Since I’m writing for your sake, I’m asking you to let me know if there’s anything you’d like me to look for in particular in the comments of this post (calorie count, gluten-free options, low carb, etc.).

Signing off,

Captain Do What I Say, Not What I Do.




My wife is a vegetarian, so if you find anything interesting in the vein that is not nachos or pretzels, I would find that interesting. Thanks!

If you find any low carb sandwich options so I’m not eating then gnawing off my hand and just going for the nachos 10 minutes later, it’d be much appreciated!

This post made me giggle because I also have an affinity for vodka drinks. They are my biggest diet downfall… I rationalize it by telling myself it’s not as bad for me as beer… The Smokehouse has halfway decent options if you forgo the bread and don’t put mayonnaise on anything. It’s hard to leave that mac & cheese alone though. It’s soooooooo good.

FYI…new churros at the ballpark. No food value at all. Your pants will hate them but they’re supposed to be awesome.

Extremely nice post. I just stumbled upon your blog and watned to say that I have actually enjoyed surfing around your blog posts. Following all I might be subscribing to your rss feed and I hope you write once again soon!

Yay! Puhleeeease do a healthy options blog about what there is available at GABP. My husband recently started eating healthy and has lost a bunch of weight and he was struggling to find something to eat when we were there opening night!

Heee! I think the closest thing to ‘healthy’ food you can find at GABP is a plate of pulled pork, hold the bun. I believe there are other ballparks where you can find sushi and salads and so forth, but at GAPB you might have to be in a suite to get a non-fried vegetable. Actually, the little convenience-store-like shops that sell mostly beer and chips sometimes have apples and bananas, which are carb-y but at least in their natural born state.

Love you Dallas….I know what you mean…..I look at some of that food and think…get the duck tape out might as well tape it to my ass!!!!!!!

Love your writing and look forward to following the journey. Go Dallas Go!

One thing that makes the Reds organization even awesome(er?) is that they allow fans to bring food items into GABP. I pack a bunch of snacks from homemade cookies and brownies to subs and bags of chips.
In the days of muti-million contracts, its refreshing that a professional organization still allows this. I can speak from experience that a venue that hosts “AMATEUR” sports, (I.e. Ohio State football,) searches fans like criminals prior to entering the gates into Ohio Stadium.

On Opening Night, the woman in front of me came back with a grilled chicken salad that looked awesome. From whence it came, I am not certain, but she didn’t bring it in with her. It was packaged in a way that made me think she got it at the UDF. What was even more awesome, was that they put the croutons on the side and made a really healthy choice in front of their two children (not sure what they gave the kids).

We pack our snacks & bottled water (or Gatorade on those 90-degree days) for the ballpark – which makes it much more affordable for us to get tickets and go – THANK YOU REDS! for letting us bring in food. We get a beer or two at the game, so the still vendors get our cash there.

Thanks, swlikeablegirl! We’ll have to look around for that! 🙂 I agree it’s awesome they let us bring stuff in…it sure does make it so much more affordable.

I know GABP does have a healthy section for food. It’s provided by trihealth. It’s right when you walk into the front of the ballpark to your right. Its the place that looks like a little market. I cant remember what its called. They have sushi and salads and things of that sort.

We got season tickets this year and with ballpark food and being on a stupid diet does not equal a good combination and a set up for failure. Keeping us updated on health conscious food would be awesome so I don’t have to wonder around GABP like a sad puppy because I can’t eat anything they offer.

If only I could get a gluten-free beer at GABP……I’m always looking for gluten-free options. LaRosa’s could offer their GF pizza……a 3 -way with GF spaghetti……a girl can dream. In the meantime I’ll just stick with my nachos and canned cheese.

Please post about low carb gluten free food (especially vegetarian/vegan). Opening night I ate an entire bag of kettle corn for dinner because I forgot to pack food. Ugh.

My fiance plays for the NHL. Our season ends in a few weeks, and I can’t wait! We have meals in the wives room every game (taco tuesdays, chicken, steak, etc), plus cookies and wine/soda/etc. Some people may think it’s great, but I think it’s a MAJOR problem!

I usually eat a little bit before the game, then somehow end up going for second and third helpings during each intermission! Then my fiance is always hungry after the game so we either go out to eat or I cook him something- even if I’m totally full, I can’t see him eating and not eat myself!

Yes, I’m probably being dramatic and should figure out a way to have more self control, but I seriously can’t wait til the freaking offseason so I can eat healthy again and have less temptation!

Hey Dallas, Totally agree about the lack of healthy choices. How about the fact that Diabetics have few choices with traditional ball park food? We need to watch carbs, fats,and sugars, and I have never seen a nutritional info sign at any of the food booths! Maybe you vast influence could help change that!

I listen to radio broadcasts of the games and must laugh (lol) every time I hear the spiel for the “Kroger Meal Deal.” Its a hot dog, a 16 oz. drink, and some tacos/fritos or chips for “just $9.00.” I bet thats a healthy “deal” for kids!!!

However, way to go Reds. Its too bad Cueto’s start was wasted two days ago, but the team came back against Cleveland. Now, Mat will start tomorrow and he is the boss of the staff. No one is pitching any better or has been more dependable. He is having an excellent year…even without the wins he should have.Dallas….you must really love that dude!!!

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